The enemies of the commuter cyclist.

Cycling is great. That’s a well known fact.
I took a long weekend in Scotland not so long ago with my mate Rich Eatough and, amongst many other excellent adventures, we rode a couple of the excellent “7 Stanes” mountain bike routes up there: Glentress and the Forest of Ae (pronounced as in "Eh?", or "Aieee!" - we were never quite sure) . Riding round Ae amongst the outstanding Dumfiries scenery in fabulous warm sunny weather really was one of those “it doesn’t get any better than this” experiences. There was a long, steady climb to the top and I remember being stuck in on Rich’s back wheel as we tanked it round the singletrack through the trees – fast. Weaving, jumping, braking, gear changes for sudden switchback climbs; out of the saddle pushing hard; back down cruising; twisting, turning and moving ever on up; heart pounding; pushing hard, breathing hard, sweating hard and knowing everythings right: body and machine working perfectly, plus there’s a huge downhill coming up very very soon. It was (and always is) just an absolutely exhilarating experience - being out there, fit and able to do this so easily. Magical.

Objective dangers on a mountain bike: not much (in dry conditions): tree roots; going too fast over one of the (now ever so trendy on these courses) ‘table tops’; going too fast in general. Nothing really if you ride within your limits.

Commuter cycling is great. Also a well known fact.
I now cycle about 10 miles each way to work and back (we moved another 5 miles away from
Bradford in July).
The smug joy of whizzing past queued traffic never quite wears off. It keeps me fit and, other than when it’s really peeing down or very windy, I enjoy it a lot.
However there are a lot more objective dangers and nearly all of them are your fellow road users. The Leeds/Bradford traffic situation is pretty is grim and on the odd I drive my commute I get there a good deal slower than I do when I bike it. Commuter cycling in heavy traffic is dangerous, regardless of how careful you are.

My main enemies on the road are (in no particular order)…

Asians: There, I said it. I am sure they are very nice people but put them behind the wheel of a car and many of them are just lethal. OK, along Leeds Road into Bradford there are a lot of Asians so most of the drivers and therefore the idiots, will be them, but some if the tricks they pull are just unbelievable. If I am to be run off the road, squeezed past, cut up, or completely ignored I almost 100% guarantee it will be an Asian driver. Their absolute favourite idiot territory is side roads – whether it’s pulling out of them last minute in front of you or careering round past and in front of you to cut you up and turn left. Asians will see you on a bike, take note and then run you off the road. I’ve driven in the far East and there is a “Might is Right” attitude wherein the bigger the vehicle the more respect it gets and the more aggressive it’s driver can be. Obviously bicycles don’t fare well in such a system. Maybe this is where they get their ‘skills’ from?
Asian women, IMHO, should not be allowed to drive cars. Nuff said.

White van drivers: I have a choice of several routes coming down in Bradford. One is Leeds Road which is Asian territory and really can be very scary, and the alternative is along a back road which is full of white vans and therefore white van drivers (WVDs). WVDs are the possibly the most aggressive kind of driver. They do tricks like overtake late, on corners, on chevrons, when there is NO room; on your left turning right round a roundabout (absolutely deadly).In general they will do anything to overtake you, even if it means they gain nothing as they are in slow moving traffic. The desperate need to overtake seems to be ingrained deeply into the tiny mind of all WVDs.

BMWs: Do people just have all sense removed when they step into a BMW or is it that this make of car is sinister? Really, I know it’s a cliché but all normal rules of the road do not seemingly apply to BMW drivers. Particularly when it comes to indicators. One positive thing is that they are dangerous in a predictable kind of fashion: I see a BMW and I know it's driver will do something stupid very soon.

The school run: Women driving Range Rovers and Shoguns. Why for God’s sake can they not drop their kids off in a more practical vehicle? My guess is they need such a monster car to feel in some way safe on the roads to make up for their complete lack of driving skills. I think they should all be made to cycle the school run for a couple of weeks abd see how it feels.

Kids in customised ‘sports’ cars: The Vauxhall Nova: why was this particular model chosen to be the recipient of useless spoilers, tasteless alloys, garish paint jobs and pointless large exhausts? Not to mention sound systems with enough bass wattage to crack buried water pipes. No wonder Yorkshire water are having to do so much work around the Bradford area at the moment. And the music they play is always crap.

And then there’s buses and large lorries who to be fair just run you into the gutter/wall/other vehicles with their back end by accident, as they are apparently not taught that if they take that corner sharply they will squash anything they are overtaking at the time.

Non – driver issues:
Twilight: You can be ready for winter and lit up like a Christmas tree with all manner of fancy and expensive halogen lamps, fluorescent stripes and reflecty stuff, but in that dusky time between when it’s light and when it’s dark you are in fact invisible.

Diesel spills: Absolutely lethal and frighteningly common. What’s this all about? I drive a diesel car and I’ve never pissed fuel all over the road from the tank.

Wet leaves. It’s nice to nip down some side roads to avoid the traffic but this time of year nature provides it’s own ice-rink equivalent, usually on sharp bends. Cheers.

So, as you can see, it’s a jungle out there. But then again I’ve bike commuted for more than 10 years on and off and (touch wood) never had a serious accident. A few near misses and some excellent shouting matches occur most weeks over my 100 miles I’d say, but these only serve to keep things interesting... :-)

EDIT: 5th Nov. Last night on the way home I pulled up at some lights on Leeds Road, trunding up the inside of the standing traffic, as I am entitled to do. At the front of the queue was a sporty Subaru filled with four young Asian lads. The window came down and the guy in the passenger seat said that they were going left and was making sure I didn't nip ahead and get in their way. This was unexpected so full marks for politeness, chaps. This made up for the other car full of Asian lads who had been leaning out of the windows and giving me abuse as we passed each other in the traffic all the way up the same road.